Why?
by Sofia25
Summary: Kogan. Why? Why does this happen to me? A while ago he hugged me and the only thing I could do was stand there without doing anything for a while and then I gently pushed him away, it was so nice to feel his body near mine and that is so so wrong... (Kendall's POV)
1. Chapter 1

Here it is another Kogan story , hope you like it :)

* * *

 _ **Kendall's POV**_

Why? Why does this happen to me? A while ago he hugged me and the only thing I could do was stand there without doing anything for a while and then I gently pushed him away, it was so nice to feel his body near mine and that is so so wrong. I don't understand why this is happening to me, why I can't control what happens to me when I see him, when he touches me or when he is near me. Why? Why? I don't get it, I wish I could understand it, I have always had control of everything that has happened in my life, but then, he came, all those years ago to change my life forever, why is this happening to me? He is my friend and for sure he can't be my lover, he is a man, not a girl, I'm a man and I'm supposed to be in love with a girl not a man.

I had heard that love was painful, but I just heard it in movies. I thought that it was not true; I even believed that love didn't exist or at least that it was something that would never happen to me, let alone to suffer for love, I believed all this till I fell in love with him. It all began a long time ago, at first I didn't understand what was happening, but then I started to accept my feeling and I thought that it was a fleeting love, well, to be honest at first it wasn't even love, it was just a crush, just a guy that I liked, but time passed and what I fell for him grew and grew till it was real love. I know I'm still young, I'm only 18 years old but I can say that I really love him, being near him is so different I can't even explain it, talking with him and seeing him makes me feel things I never thought I could feel and less for a man.

Knowing that what I feel is a one-sided love makes me want to cry and I don't cry, I have never felt real want to cry in my life, I have always consider myself an strong person, but here I'm, sitting in the grass and watching the water that is in the lake I have in front of me, with my hands on my face and doing everything I can not to cry. Knowing that the one I love will never return my feeling is a horrible feeling to feel.

All this is killing me; sometimes I just can't stand it, why did I have to fall in love with him? Why? It's so unfair.

I feel that I fail myself; I can't understand why he makes me feel this way.

No one knows what I feel for him and none will ever know it, this love that I feel toward him is my biggest secret and I will never let anyone know it, I will never show it. And besides, letting someone know that I like him won't change that fact that Logan is not gay, let alone in love with me. So, this secret will die with me.

Today when he hugged me I really wanted to hugged him back and stay like that for the rest of my life, but the only thing I was able to do was stand there without moving, gently push him away and then without saying one world I came here, far away from him, far away from those feelings, far away from the heat that went through my body when he hugged me.

I wish I could change what I'm feeling; I feel so weak right now, so pathetic and so stupid.

My heart and my chest hurt so much and I can't fight this feeling anymore, I can't stand it, I just want to scream and take this out of me.

Where is all the courage and strength that I always have? I can't find that right now, I'm not felling like myself. Who would've thought that I would be crying over another man, crying over Logan? No one, not even myself, But I'm a human and I have feelings that I wish I didn't have.

If only I could be able to suppress what I feel for him, that is all I really want, I don't want to suffer anymore; I don't want to feel like an stupid every time he looks at me just because I can't help but smile or every time he smiles and my heart starts pounding. I want to stop feeling like an idiot every time he is near me and I feel in my stomach that feeling that is so strange but that feels so good at the same time. I just want to vanish this feeling.


	2. Chapter 2

_Today is my birthday and as an auto gif i'm uploading this :P so here it's the second chapter, hope you like it :)_

* * *

 **Normal POV**

Kendall was sitting on the grass, thinking about his feelings and wondering why was that happening to him, he was so confused and so stressed that he was even crying, and that was something really unusual in him.

No one else was there or at least that was what he thought but suddenly someone spoke

"There you are"

Kendall was paralyzed, he knew who the owner of that voice was, it was from one of his friends, and it was James's voice. He didn't want anyone to see him in that state and he didn't want to give explanations about why he was like that. It was something too personal for him.

James sat down next to Kendall and the first thing Kendall did was look to one side because he didn't want James to see that there were tear in his eyes. However when James looked at him he could notice that Kendall had been crying.

"Kendall, what happened?" James asked him really worried about his friend.

At that moment Kendall got up without saying anything with the intention of leaving but James also got up quickly and grabbed his arm to stop Kendall from leaving.

"You're not going to get away from me Kendall, what happened?"

Kendall moved his arm to free himself of his friend's grasp and without looking at him or speaking, he started to walk but at that moment James grabbed his arm again.

"Leave me alone James" Kendall told him, moving his arm to free himself again from his friend's grasp, and then he wiped his tears and kept walking.

James would never shut up when he wants to say something and that was why without even thinking he asked Kendall:

"Does it have something to do with Logan?"

Kendall was paralyzed for a while but then he kept walking pretending that James's questions didn't affect him one bit but the truth was that inside he was panicking and thinking ' _It can't be true, how can he know it? I can't believe it, what's going on?_ '

James was walking behind him.

"Don't ignore me Kendall, we have been friends for a long time, six year to be exact, don't do that to me"

Kendall was still walking without saying anything.

"I have been observing you lately and I could see that you always act differently when you are with him"

Both of them were silent for a while till James spoke again:

"I also saw that you were a little red when he hugged you today"

James had started to walk faster and by the time he told him that he was in front of Kendall and he could see that Kendall was red again.

"You were exactly like you are right now or maybe a little redder"

"It's none of your business James" Kendall told him and started to walk faster to be in front of James again.

"Kendall, tell my true, are you gay?"

Kendall stood still and then with a serious voice he said:

"Don't bother me James"

"I thought that you were a little less cowardly but I see that I was wrong because you don't even have the courage to confesses that to a friend"

Kendall kept walking without saying a word.

"I can see now that you're as cowardly as any other person even though you try to hide it sometime" James added a while later.

"Leave me alone" Kendall told him angrily.

"Okay, I will leave you alone, but remember that now I know your not so little secret"

Kendall turned around and looked at him with fear in his face, and then he looked ahead and kept walking. Upon seeing Kendall's face of panic James just laughed and said:

"Don't worry Kendall, I won't say anything"

"I never admitted anything James"

"If it wasn't true you would have already denied it and besides your face says more than one thousand words"

"You don't understand anything James, leave me alone"

"At least you are not denying it" James said

Kendall stood still, shut his eyes tightly, clenched his fists and said:

"Stop it James, leave me alone, I'm being serious"

"If you like to suffer alone and in silence, good for you, I just wanted to help you; I came here to talk with you about this, however I never thought that you were this bad about all this. but now I see that you prefer to be like this alone and without talking with anyone"

James went back to Logan's house and Kendall kept walking alone.

 **Kendall's POV**

Am I that obvious? I can't believe that James have realized that, I want to kill myself, not literally but I just want the earth to swallow me for a whole year, how could I let anyone see that weakness on me? I can't believe it. I feel so stupid right now, this entire situation is confusing me a lot, I'm scared, I didn't want anyone to know that I like him.

 **Normal POV**

 _At the same time in their apartment._

Logan saw how Kendall left without saying a word after he hugged him.

"Ey, is something wrong?" Carlos asked him when he notice that his friend had gotten a little sad

"No, why?" Logan told him a little surprised.

"I don't know your face changed after Kendall left"

"I it's just that I wish he would show a little more affection toward me"

"But Kendall is like that, you know him" Carlos told him.

"Yes but..." ' _I don't know why his behavior upset me like that, it's just that sometime I think he doesn't consider me his friend'_ Logan thought and then ended what he was saying with an:

"But, never mind"

Carlos looked at him a little confused.

Upon noticing his friend's confused face Logan said:

"Sometime I feel that he hates me and doesn't even consider me a friend"

"Ey, don't say that, Kendall does consider you a friend, you know that"

"I don't really know"

"You're overreacting, don't worry so much"

"Yes maybe you are right," Logan told hi m a little sad.

At that moment they saw that James was leaving.

"Where are you going?" Carlos asked him

"I just want to walk a little, don't worry, I will be back in a while" James said.

 **Logan's POV**

I don't even know why Kendall's behavior upset me the way it did, after all Carlos was right, Kendall has been acting like that for a while, this was nothing new. I'm just exaggerating by thinking that he hates me, but I just don't know. I wish he was a little different but I don't even know why.


	3. Chapter 3

_I haven't write or think about this story in so long that I think I've forgotten all the ideas I had for this one. I know this chapter is not really good, but it was the best i could do :(. Anyway, hope you like it, and please review and tell what you think about it. And, sorry for the long wait._

* * *

 **Logan's POV**

Kendall hasn't come back since he left, I don't know where he is, and I don't know why I worry so much. He is used to be on his own, but I worry for my friends.

I remember his coldness when I hugged him this evening, and it makes my chest hurt, but I don't understand why; maybe it's because I'm not used to people treating me like that, so cold and distant. But Kendall has been like that for a long time, and I should accept it, but I just can't.

Ahg, it makes me so sad the way he treats me and sincerely I don't know why. I should be accustomed to it, but he is my friend, and I wish he was different. His attitude makes me really sad.

 **Normal POV**

 _3 days later_

Carlos, Logan and Camille were outside, in the pool.

Kendall had gone to the apartment to look for a bottle of water and James took advantage of that opportunity to follow him and talk to him about something he wanted to tell him since that day when he found Kendall crying; that day he didn't say anything due to the bad mood his friend was in, at the moment.

"Kendall, can we talk?" James asked him.

"What do you want James?'" Kendall asked him seriously, while he was grabbing the bottle from the fridge.

"Kendall, can you stop acting so cold and distant for just one minute? Is that too much to ask?"

Kendall only rolled his eyes.

"Kendall I'm just trying to help you. I'm your friend and I care about you, can we talk about it? It won't kill you. Believe me"

"Agh, James, don't bother me"

"I didn't know that caring about you and trying to help you was bothering you, but thanks for the tip" James told him a little offended.

"Can you get to the point James? Just tell me what you want"

"It- it's about Logan" James said scratching his head nervously.

"I have nothing to talk about him" Kendall told him, looking at him with a serious look.

"Come on Kendall; stop pretending. You know I know it"

"I'm not pretending anything James; I just want you to leave me alone. I have nothing to talk about that topic"

"Kendall, I really want to help you, and I know it mustn't be easy for you"

"I don't think you can understand it" Kendall told him sounding a little depressed.

"Oh Kendall, you're right, I really can't, but let me at least give you an advise"

Kendall only looked at him a little intrigued.

"Stop being so cold and distant to him. The other day, when you left, he even said he thought you hate him" James finally said.

"What?" Kendall said a little surprised.

"Yes, Kendall, he said it after he hugged you, and you left"

"Hn" Was all Kendall said, acting as if he didn't care.

"Kendall, please stop pretending you don't care"

"I'm not pretending, he can think whatever he wants, I don't care" Kendall said, but it was pretty clear in his voice that he was laying.

"Stop it Kendall, stop acting. You know I know it, and you are not going to make me believe it's not true" James told him.

Kendall rolled his eyes once again and didn't say anything. He knew that keep on pretending was in vain. James already knew the truth and there was nothing he could do, or say to change James's mind now.

"The only thing you do by treating him like that is pushing him away more and more, you're only prejudicing yourself" James said later.

Kendall was getting irritated with this conversation.

"And what do you know about that?" Kendall told him angrily.

"If he thinks you hate him, he will never want to be with you, or even think about that, did you ever think about that? Why are you so cold with him? You're just pushing him away"

Kendall sighed and then looked down.

"I really understand that it must not be easy for you, but pushing him away, or denying your feelings is not the answers Kendall" James told him.

"What do you really want James?"

"Help you that is all I want, only that" James told him

"There is nothing you can do to help me James" Kendall was getting angry once again.

"And if you don't let me help you, of course Kendall. You can't always rely only on yourself, there is always a moment in life when you need someone else's helps" James told him a little annoyed.

"I really don't understand what you really want, you already know that I like Logan, Are you happy now that I have said it aloud?" Kendall said in high voice.

"Shh, Kendall, don't shout, or do you want everyone to know that?" James told him in a low voice.

Kendall blushed a little, but only a little.

"I'm glad you finally said it, don't you feel better now that you've said and admitted it? " James added later.

"Don't expect me to say thank you" Kendall told him joking.

James just laughed and said:

"I wasn't really expecting that, I just want to help you, seriously, I know you are not going to do it, but if one day you need or want to talk with someone about this you know I will be here, ready to listen"

"Thank you" Kendall told him, smiling a little.

"Really, treating him so coldly won't help you" James told him.

"Please, stop James. I don't want to talk about this anymore" Kendall told him calmly.

….

Meanwhile Logan was going to his room to look for something he needed and when he passed by the kitchen door; he heard his friends talking, and like in a movie he arrived just in time to hear what he shouldn't have heard:

' _I like Logan, Are you happy now that I have said it aloud?'_

…


	4. Chapter 4

_Here it's another chapter. Hope you like it and let me know what you think of this, please._

 **Logan's POV**

' _I like Logan, Are you happy now that I have said it aloud?'_

What? Did I hear that right? Did Kendall just say that he likes me? Was it real? Oh god, I'm so confused, I don't understand anything.

 _(Logan heard James saying something but he couldn't comprehend what he was saying)_

Oh,I should better get going, I wasn't supposed to hear that.

…

Why doesn't it bother me that Kendall likes me? Why doesn't it make me feel disgusted? Why should I feel like that anyway? I'm not homophobic. Ahg, I don't even know what I'm saying, but knowing that he likes me doesn't bother me at all and I don't understand why. Agh, I'm so confused right now; I don't know what to think, and what should I think anyway? I don't know what to do, or how I'm going to look at him in the face after this.

But nothing makes sense, maybe I heard wrong, why would he be so cold to me if he likes me? None of this makes any sense; I'm really confused. But I know I didn't hear it wrong, I heard him perfectly clear, I heard Kendall saying that. I'm 100% sure.

Oh god, I don't wanna get out of here, what should I do? Tell him I know? Tell him I don't feel the same? Do nothing? Agh, I'm so confuse right now, why did I have to hear it?

I think that doing nothing is the best option; I mean, tell him the truth and then tell him I don't feel the same would be a really cruel thing to do.

Wow, I can't believe Kendall is gay; I would've never imagined it; never in my life. Maybe that's why he has been acting so cool and a little distant. Maybe it's for hiding something as big as his sexuality. Maybe it's his way to 'protect' himself and hid it; well I guess.

The good thing about it all is that at least I know he doesn't hate me.

Agh, I have to leave this room before someone comes and asks me why I'm taking so long. But I don't know what to do; I have to pretend I didn't hear a thing. I think I will try to ignore Kendall as much as I can, maybe that will give him a sign that I don't feel the same way without having to be so direct, or maybe he doesn't even realized I'm doing that; after all, it's what he has been doing with me for a while now; acting as if I didn't exist.

 **Normal POV**

Logan came back to where his friends where; James and Kendall were back as well.

The day passed as if it was another normal day, but it was hard for Logan to look at Kendall, or even to talk to him. He felt… he didn't feel uncomfortable he just felt a little embarrassed.

No one really noticed the change in Logan's behavior, or at least they didn't think it was weird; after all, he had said a few days ago that he thought Kendall hated him, so keeping his distance wasn't a crazy thing to do.

And Kendall, well, he just felt a little awkward because he knew James knew the truth, but he didn't even imagine that the one he likes knew it as well. One of his biggest fears had come true, and he wasn't even aware of that.

 _That same day, at night_

 **Kendall's POV**

I'm not going to lie and say that talking with James didn't help me at all. It's true that it feels good to know that there is somebody that is willing to hear me without judging me for begin what I'm. However, I don't plan on talking with him about this ever again, because I just don't like to talk about this topic in particular, but at least I know that if someday I need or want to talk about it, James will be there to hear me.

It's not every day that I'm as sad and depressed as that day James saw me crying. The majority of the time I can find inside me the strength, and the courage to be strong, but there are other times, like that day, when I just can't, and how much I hate it when that happens. I really hate the fact that Logan makes me feel like that. I really hate not being able to suppress my feeling. I wish I could do it; it would save me so much pain, because I'm a human. I do have feelings, and I do suffer because of love and I also suffer because I can't control what happens to me. I didn't choose to be like this, it just happened; no one can choose who to fall in love with. It just happens, and it happened to me with a man, who is also my friend.

I'm over the stage of denial; I've been for a long time now. Denying it to myself wasn't going to solve anything, and ignore my feelings didn't help at all either, and the truth is that I don't really know what I should do to make those fucking feelings I have for him vanish, because that's all I want. I really don't want to feel like this.

 **Logan's POV**

Why can't I stop thinking about what I heard? What's going on with me? I feel weird and I think I'm paying too much attention to something I shouldn't or maybe I should. I mean, I just found out that one of my male friends likes me. It's impossible not to pay too much attention to that.

But if it was a girl instead of Kendall, I wonder if I would be feeling like I'm feeling right now or if wouldn't even care about that. Agh, I'm so confused. It's not the first time I found out someone likes me, but it's the first time the subject won't leave me alone; I can't stop thinking about that phrase I heard and it's not because Kendall is a boy that it happens to me, or maybe yes I really don't know, but I've realized that the difference doesn't really affect me, as I said before, I'm not homophobic, but for some reason what I heard just won't leave me alone.

Maybe it's because that person is Kendall and not anyone else but, why? Agh, I don't even know what to think. Would I be feeling like this if it was Carlos, or James instead of Kendall? Maybe yes, or not, agh I don't really know; maybe it's because of the bond of friendship that exists between us that I can't stop thinking about it. It's weird, but at the same time it isn't. I'm really, but really confused, so I prefer to think about something else till I can processes all this new information and think about it in a calmer way.

However, the only thing I know, and I'm sure about It is that I don't want to ruin the friendship I have with Kendall; knowing that he likes me doesn't change what I think about him and I won't stop being his friend just for that, but the problem is how will he take my rejection if one day he finds the courage to tell me something about it; I would feel like shit if that really happens.

…


	5. Chapter 5

_Two days later_

 **Logan POV**

Since I have overheard that conversation between Kendall and James, I can't stop thinking about that, but now I know what I'm going to do. I'm going to talk with James. I don't even know why, but I have to talk with him; maybe he could help me. Help me with what? I don't even know, but I can't live like this anymore, and talking with Kendall is not an option, of course.

Maybe I need a real confirmation of what I heard and the only one I can talk to is James, and I'm going to do it now, before losing the little courage I have. I don't even know what I'm going to tell him: I will just say the first thing that comes to my mind at that moment. If think too much about it, I will never do it. I'm not the kind of guy that would shut up, but this is a serious topic and it's really affecting me, so I don't know what the right thing to say or ask is. I'm just so confused. I don't feel like myself anymore. What have you done to my, Kendall? Well he hasn't done anything. I'm the one who doesn't know what to do, or think anymore.

Ok, back to the important thing; the only difficulty in talking with James is talking with him without the others suspecting something. We are all at the apartment right now, we have been all day rehearsing for the tour we will have in about a month.

So, I think I will wait for the perfect opportunity. I have to talk with James without the others hearing that I have something to talk only with him.

….

 **Normal POV**

It was 8 pm and the guys were playing some game in the living room. At some point, James sat up and went to the bathroom, and at that moment Logan realized that was the perfect opportunity to talk to him:

"Ey guys I will go to the kitchen, does anybody want something?" Logan asked.

"Yes, please, bring me some coke" Katie, who was also with them said, without taking his eyes off the screen.

"I will go with you, I want some water" Carlos said.

"NO, I mean, it's ok, I will bring you the water; don't worry" Logan said.

"Fine, thanks you" Carlos answered.

…

Logan waited for James a few steps away from the bathroom, and as soon as he got out he told him he wanted to talk.

"Hey, James I want to tell you something"

"What's it? " James asked a little confused.

"Let's go to the kitchen so we can talk in a better place"

James was still confused and also a little concerned for his friend. He seemed to be really nervous and worried.

They went to the kitchen, and Logan started to fill up some glasses with the things Carlos and Katie had asked.

"So, what do you need to tell me?" James asked.

"Mmm, well, am" Logan tried to speak, but failed miserably. James looked at him with a confused look on his face.

"Logan are you fine?"

"No, not really; I heard something I shouldn't have, and now I don't know what to do" Logan said taking a deep breath and speaking quickly.

"And, what did you hear? Can I help you with something? or you just wanted to take that out of your chest?" James asked casually.

"Actually, I-I heard you talking wi-with K-Kendall" Logan said stuttering.

And after hearing that, James went pale. He knew what Logan was talking about, but he decided to play dumb anyway.

"I heard Kendall saying he likes me, did I hear right?" Logan spoke quickly, so quickly that James almost couldn't understand him.

"Wh-what? A-are you D-drunk? H-he never told me-me that" James said, really nervous.

"I wish I was drunk, I wish it was a dream, but you have confirmed me everything with your answer" Logan said, looking at the ground.

"I-I didn't say anything, y-you didn't hear right, why would Kendall tell ME something li-like that" James was sweating and really nervous.

"You are a horrible liar James. I wish I was wrong, but now I know I'm not"

"Logan, please, don't tell anything to Kendall, if he knows, he will kill me"

"Don't worry; you didn't say anything. After all I overheard your conversation" Logan said still looking at the ground.

"Fuck, why do I have to be in the middle of this? That happens for poking my nose in somebody else's problem" James thought at loud.

"I'm sorry. I won't say anything James; don't worry. I just don't know what to do" Logan was in the verge of tears, and that was clear in his voice.

James got closer to Logan and told him:

"I'm the one who is sorry; I was being an idiot a while ago. My friend's problems are my problems as well. If Kendall discovers you know, and if he kills me after that, I will deserve it. After all, I forced him to tell me that"

Logan looked at James with clear confusion on his face.

"It's a long story I won't tell you, I have screwed it up too much already" James said.

"I wish I hadn't heard your conversation, I really wish that"

"So, that means you don't feel the same?" James asked.

"James, to be honest, I really don't know, I never thought about that possibility, and I don't know if I want to think too much about it" After saying that, one tear fall from his eyes, and Logan clear it quickly.

"I get it really affected you, I'm sorry. I guess it might not be easy"

"It's not; I really don't know what to do James. I don't want things to be awkward between us. Kendall is my friend, and now I know why he was being so cold"

"But you told me you're not sure about what you feel. I think you should think deeper about that and then decide what to do" James told him while he put an arm on one of Logan's shoulders.

"It's not so easy James, I'm confused as fuck, and I really don't know what to do, or what to think. I hate feeling like this"

"I can't say that I understand you, because I will be lying, and to be honest, I don't really know what to say either. All this is my fault. I pushed Kendall to confess that to me. I wanted to help him, and make him know that he has friends who will support him. You weren't supposed to hear that" James said feeling really guilty.

"I know I wasn't, but I did. Agh, let's come back before the other notice we have been here for a long time, and forget we ever have this conversation"

"Ok, but, Logan, if you ever want to talk to someone, about anything, just know that you have a friend here that will be willing to hear you" James told him, with a reassuring smile.

"Thank you" Logan said, and then they left.

…

The other guys were still playing as if nothing had happened.

Once James and Logan were back, Katie asked:

"What take you so long? And where is my coke?"

"Oh, I-I run into James, we started to talk and I forgot your drinks; I will be back in a minute" Logan said, and went to look for the drinks.

"What's wrong with him? He was acting really weird" Carlos asked James.

"No-nothing, we were talking, about-about the tour"

"Now you're the one who is acting really strange" Carlos said.

"Forget about it Carlos. It's nothing; give me the controller. It's my turn" James said

Kendall noticed that something was not right, but he decided to ignore that.

…


	6. Chapter 6

_One week later_

 **Kendall's POV**

Logan has been a little weird, I stop ignoring him, or treating him in a bad way, but now he is the one who tries to avoid me all the time; I wonder if James told him something, he has been a little weird lately too, if James really did that I will kill him and I'm not kidding. I trusted him and if he betrayed me I will never forgive him.

 **Logan's POV**

I still don't know what to do, or think, and have been trying to figure out something, but the only thing I'm capable of is ignoring Kendall, and that's not fair for him; well actually it's. He has been so cold and distant with me in the past few years, but I know why he acts like that. I'm being such an idiot, I'm not like this.

 **James's POV**

The guilt is killing me; I can't even look at Kendall in the eyes anymore. I feel all this is my fault; I was the one who made Kendall confessed. Of course I didn't even imagine that Logan could be listening, but he did, and it was my fault. I have to tell Kendall the truth; it's the least I can do. He is going to be angry I know that, but I deserve it even he punches me I know I deserve it, but I can't live like this anymore. It's really hard to see him and act as if nothing has happened.

Logan will be also angry, but what can I do? Kendall was sincere to me, and I have to do the same. I will tell Kendall everything, and if he hates me after that I know I deserve it, but I will do it tomorrow, I need some time before doing it.

 _One day later_

 **Normal POV**

It was a rainy day, t guys were rehearsing; the begging of the tour was getting closer and closer.

The atmosphere between them was a little awkward; the tension was in the air. The only one who was out of all that was Carlos. However, he was sensing that something was not right, but surprisingly he preferred to stay shut and say nothing. He noticed that James was kind of tense and nervous and that was definitely not a good sign. So he preferred to stay out of this, he knew it was for the best.

As for James, he was waiting for the perfect moment; the perfect moment to cave his own grave or at least that was what he was thinking. And he knew that moment was soon to arrive. He was waiting till they were once again at the hotel to tell the truth to Kendall.

...

 _A few hours later_

It was still raining, but it was not a cold day. Kendall was outside. He was leaning against a column, he had been there since they arrived; he didn't even entered the house. He was not feeling fine, he was not confortable, and he sensed the weird atmosphere as well.

James entered the house to drink some water and gain some courage in the processes, and once he was outside the room he was determined to tell everything to Kendall.

James took a deep breath and started to go outside, but when he was almost out Carlos spoke:

"Where are you going? "

"I have something to tell Kendall"

"Oh, fine, go then" That was all Carlos said. Maybe in other circumstances he would've asked more, but at that moment he knew he didn't have to say anything; James's face had already told him everything, this was a serious thing and was only between them.

...

"Hey Kendall, it's raining too hard for you to be here, isn't it?" James asked.

"Maybe, and what about you?"

"The truth is that I have something to tell you" James said looking at the ground.

Kendall gulped and said:

"Don't say anything else"

"What?" James asked looking at him.

"You told Logan right?" Kendall was not looking at James and he seemed to be calmed.

"Kendall.."

"Shut up I don't want to hear you, I trusted you and you betrayed me"

"Kendall that's not true, let me talk at least. I will take the blame but I didn't tell him"

"Oh, sure, he just discovered it by himself"

"No, he overheard us talking" James said and Kendall went pale.

"I know it was my fault, but I didn't mean it to happen; I'm so sorry Kendall" James add later.

"How?" Kendall asked coldly.

"What?" James asked a little confused.

"How do you know he overheard us?"

"He told me"

"When?"

"One week ago"

"You have known that for a week and you didn't tell me anything? You sure are a good friend"

"Logan told me not to tell you, but the guilt was killing me; that's why I'm telling you this now"

"I knew I shouldn't have told you. Now I understand everything" Kendall was angry and it was clear in his voice.

"What are you talking about?"

"You wanted me and Logan to be distant, didn't you?"

"What? Why would I want that Kendall?"

"Don't play dumb, you wanted me to feel miserable, so then you will have more opportunities to show off at the concerts"

"What? You are offending me now, I take the blame on Logan knowing, but don't say stupid things; that's not true"

"Am I supposed to believe you?"

"Do whatever you want Kendall; I never meant to hurt you. I'm sorry"

"You know what? I knew something was wrong; I feel it. I have been thinking of leaving the band and this place, and that's what I'm going to do, you win James" Kendall was determined to really do that and that was clear in his voice.

"What? Stop being like that, don't leave us, and don't leave him. And stop saying no sense; I didn't win anything. I don't want you to leave. You are part of the band and more important you are my friend"

"I can't stand being near Logan anymore, it hurts, it hurts a lot actually, and now that I know he knows I like him; I won't be able to look at him again"

Kendall's voice was broken, it seemed as if he was crying, but as it was raining Kendall face was too wet to know if there were tears or not.

"Kendall…"

"Don't say you are sorry because you don't even know how I'm feeling right now"

"Yes you are right, I have no idea what you are going through, but saying shit about me or leaving won't be a solution either"

"I'm sorry for saying that about you, I don't know what's going on with me, but I have made my choice, I'm leaving"

When he said that; he looked at James and that moment James realized Kendall was crying, his eyes were red and for a moment he could even see the tears in spite of the rain.

"It is fine Kendall; I won't say I'm sorry; I won't say anything. I will only ask you to stay, we need you; he needs you, please Kendall; rethink about it"

"No, James. I'm leaving, and I will do it now"

James started to followed Kendall, he was going straight to the house, James tried to speak with hi once again but it was in vain, Kendall was not listening.

Once they were inside the apartment, James tried to look for someone but surprisingly the house was empty. Meanwhile Kendall was grabbing all his things and putting them inside a suitcase.

James finally found a note written by Logan that said that they all had gone to buy something at the city center, so he tried to convince Kendall alone, but it was in vain.

…

 _Thanks for reading :) . Reviews are always welcome._


	7. Chapter 7

**Normal POV**

Kendall was determined to leave. James was following him and trying to convinced him to stay, he didn't care about the rain; he just wanted to make his friend stay, but he didn´t know what to do. He was trying his best, but it was in vain.

Kendall was walking fast, without even caring or hearing what James was saying. After a few minutes James realized there was nothing he could do, so he said:

"Fine I will leave. I just hope you change your mind before it's too late"

Kendall didn't even look at him.

James was devastated: he felt defeated, and at some point guilty as well; he was convinced that this whole situation was his fault.

And now he had to tell the other guys that Kendall was gone, that he had left the band. It was not going to be easy, not at all. First of all, because he felt it was his fault; he was convinced of that. And at the same time he was feeling bad for Kendall; he knew it was not easy for him to go through it. He knew he was hurt and it made him feel even more miserable.

Of course it was not really his fault, but there was no one who would tell him he was wrong; therefore, in his mind he was the cause off all this.

A few minutes later, James was once again at the house.

The guys, plus Katy were in the living room, talking and waiting for them.

"What took you so long?" Katy asked.

James didn't answer, and a few seconds later Carlos asked:

"And where is Kendall? And why are you soaked?"

James didn't know how to tell them that Kendall was gone. It should be easy for him, but it wasn't. First of all because he knew his friends wouldn't be happy, and also because he was feeling really guilty; he was convinced it was his fault.

"I-I have something to tell you guys" James finally said, after a few seconds.

"Fine, but change your cloths first, you must be freezing" Logan told him.

"No, I need to say it now, it's important"

James was serious, really serious and as soon as the others guys realized it, they knew it was something really important; therefore, they start to worry.

"James, what's going on?" Carlos asked really concerned.

James looked at them, but he was speechless.

"James just say it" Logan almost screamed.

"Ke-Ke, Kendall is not going to come back; he-he is leaving" James finally said.

"What?" They all asked at the same time.

"Te-tell me you are joking, it's not true right?" Logan asked.

"I knew something was going on, but I didn't even imagine he was going to leave. Now tell us, why did he leave?" Carlos was angry.

Katy didn't say a word; she was surprised, of course. She was Kendall's sister and she knew nothing, but she felt it was not his business. It did concerned her, but she was sure there were other things involved in this conflict, and she didn't feel part of it. It was something between them. So she slowly started to leave the room.

"I-I won't say anything, I tried to convinced him, but it was all in vain" James said.

"Why James? Why is he leaving? Say it, I know you know it" Logan said.

James didn't answer.

"Come on James, say something" Logan said.

"I-I can't" James look at Logan, and at moment everything made sense for him.

"Ca-Carlos, can you leave us alone, please?" Logan said, once he was over the shock.

Carlos was going to complain, but something in Logan's voice told him he really needed to leave.

"Fine" Carlos said, and left the room.

Once James and Logan were alone, Logan started to speak.

"James, please, tell why did he leave, and tell me the truth"

James looked at him, but said nothing.

The last thing Kendall told him was:

" _James, if you still consider me your friend, don't tell Logan the truth, please"_

"Please, James tell me it has nothing to do with me"

James only looked at the ground and started to go to the front door, but Logan stopped him.

"James, just said it. Why are you acting like this? Just tell me why Kendall left"

"I won't say anything; I've fucked it up once already, I won't do it again" James was almost crying, he was not feeling fine. He said those words without really wanting to say them, and after saying that he left the house.

Logan was paralyzed, what James had said was enough to confirm him everything. Kendall was gone, and it was because of him.

One tear rolled through Logan's cheek. He was still paralyzed; squatting on the floor.

 _Meanwhile_

Katy was in the kitchen, impatiently waiting for the talk to be over when suddenly she heard someone, she turned around and realized it was Carlos. She was a little confused.

"What happened?" Katy asked.

"I don't know. Logan asked me to leave"

"Oh, this is so strange"

"Yeah, I suspected something was not right; now I know I was not wrong, but I still don't know what's going on. James didn't say anything. Did you know Kendall was thinking of leaving the band?"

"No, he didn't tell me anything; I'm a little angry with him" Katy said.

"By the way, Logan and Kendall have been a little more distant than always lately, do you think it has something to do with it?" Katy asked.

"I really don't know, but I have notice that too"

A few seconds later they heard the front door close; they looked at each other with clear confusion, and decided to go where the guys were.

When they were finally there they saw Logan; alone looking at the floor.

"Logan" Carlos said.

There was no answer

"LOGAN" Katy screamed.

Logan was still in the same place, without even noticing he was not alone.

"Hey Logan" Carlos said, getting closer to him and touching his shoulder.

"What happened? And where is James?'" Carlos said a few seconds later.

At that moment Logan realized he was not alone anymore, he stood up and started to go to his room.

Katy and Carlos looked at each other again really confused. They started to follow him, but Logan told them:

"Leave me alone, please"

 **Logan's POV**

What's that feeling on my stomach? And why my chest is hurting like this? It seems as if something was constricting my chest. This is so horrible; I want to stop it.

I know why I'm like this; I feel betrayed. Kendall left us, a few days before starting the tour.

Why? He is so childish and egoist.

That is why my chest hurt this much, it has to be that. And besides I fell that at some point it's my fault, because I can't return his feeling. Well, actually it's not my fault he didn't even had the guts to tell me in the face his feelings. He just left without even saying anything; what a coward. I thought he was different; I tough he was braver, but he is not.

Agh, he is an idiot I shouldn't be feeling like this because of him. If he wants to leave it's better for me. We don't need him. We will replace him easily.

 **Normal POV**

Katy and Carlos were on the couch with the TV on, but they were not really paying attention to it. They were lost in his thoughts. Too many things had happen on this day; they couldn't be relaxed.

"Carlos"

"What?"

"I was going to stay out of this, but you know what? I'm Kendall's sister. I want an explanation; I won't sit here and do nothing. Let's go and find James. And if he doesn't want to tell us anything we will have to go and find Kendall on our own. Are you with me?" Katy said.

"You're right Katy. Of course I'm with you. Let's do it"

"Fine, let's do it now, we don't have time to lose"

Once they were outside the hotel; they saw James sitting on a bench with his head down.

"Look, isn't that James?" Carlos asked Katy; pointing to were James was.

"Yes, I think it's him"

"Hey, James" Carlos said.

James looked at them, stood up and started to walk once again.

"Wait, we are not going to stop until you speak to us, so don't even try to leave" Katy said

James stopped and looked at them.

"What do you want?" James asked.

"The truth" Carlos said.

"We don't care what happened between you, Kendall and Logan, But Kendall left, and we want to know what's going on" Katy added.

"I don't want to excluded any of you, but I can't tell you, please understand; I'm not doing it because I think it's funny" James said.

"Then, tell us where Kendall is, you must know that" Carlos said.

"I don't know where he is, but he told me he was going to leave for real. So I think he is leaving the town, not just the band"

"Katy, do you know where could he possible go?" Carlos asked.

"Well… let me think… OH yes; we have family in Minnesota"

"Oh yeah, that's right" Carlos said feeling a little stupid for not thinking about that earlier.

"Wait, where is Logan?" James asked.

"Oh Logan, he is at home. We didn't even tell him we were leaving" Katy said.

"Will you come with us?" Carlos asked James.

"No, I don't want to be in the middle of this"

"What? You don't care about the band" Katy asked.

"I didn't say that, I Just- I. If Kendall wants to leave we should let him. It was his choice" James said.

"At least make us a favor and tell Logan we are gone, and tell him we are going to bring Kendall back" Carlos said.

"No, I'm sorry but I won't. Send him a message or something" James said.

"What's going on with you?" Carlos asked.

"Just leave me alone and go if you stay here wasting your time you won't find Kendall here in California"

"Fine" Carlos said.

"Katy, do you have you cellphone?" Carlos asked.

"No. I left it at the house"

"So did I. Well, let's go. Logan won't come out of his bedroom for a long time" Carlos said.

And just like that Carlos and Katy started his journey in search of Kendall.

…


	8. Chapter 8

_Here it is the next chapter. Hope you like it._

 _It's possible that the next chapter will be the last one._

* * *

 **Normal POV**

"We should take a Taxi to the airport now; it will be the fastest way to get there. He must be still there, well I hope" Carlos said.

"Yes, you're right"

"Oh, wait do you have money? I left everything at home, even my wallet" Katie said.

"Yes, I do"

Half an hour was the time it took them to take a taxi, and another half an hour to get to the airport.

"The things we have to do for our friends, well and my brother. We haven't even eaten. I'm starving" Katie said.

"Yeah, you're right. I'm hungry too, but once we find Kendall we'll eat whatever we want" Carlos said.

"Yes, and I after I punch him in the middle of the face for leaving without saying anything"

"If you really do it I swear I will invite you to dinner tomorrow" Carlos said.

"You have just given me another reason to find Kendall"

Once they were at the airport, they run inside to look for Kendall.

"This place is so big I'm always lost when we are here; it will be almost impossible to find him" Carlos said.

"Mmm… I don't think so, and cover your face before someone recognizes you" Katie said.

"Oh yes, you are right, we have to look for someone hiding his face or people reunited in the same place"

"Exactly, or we can ask some people if they have seen him"

And just like that they heard a boy saying:

" _I can't believe I have a photo whit Kendall Knight, he is the best"_

They looked at each other and without even thinking what they were doing they run after the boy.

"Have you seen Kendall?" "Where is him?" Katie and Carlos spoke almost at the same time.

The boy was shock, whit his mouth and eyes wide open.

"I can't believe it; Carlos Garcia is here too. This must be the best day of my life" The boy said out loud.

And a few seconds later a bunch of people were surrounding them.

 **Logan's POV**

I've been here, locked in my room, for about an hour. The house seems to be quiet; it's not usual when the guys are here, but I guess today is not a normal day. I mean not every day one of your friends and team mate leaves you as if you were nothing without even saying one word.

I should get up, but I really don't want to leave this room. I don't want to accept that Kendall is gone. I just can't accept it; it must be a joke. However, I know it's real and I if go out reality will hit me hard.

Even if I said that we didn't need Kendall; I know we need him. I know I need him, and I can't stand the thought of him leaving again. I just can't stand it, but there is nothing I can do.

I don't even understand why I'm feeling like this, so devastated. I hate this feeling. I just want to speak with Kendall and tell him to come back, but I can't do that. And besides I'm not sure if I'm angry at him for leaving or if I'm just sad.

 **Normal POV **

It took James half an hour to realize he was acting like a complete idiot. And after that, fifteen minutes was all it took him to come back to the hotel.

"Logan, Logan" James said, once he was at the house.

There was no answer, so he assumed that Logan was still inside his bedroom.

James knocked at the door.

"Who is it?" Logan asked

"James, I need to tell you something" James said.

"Come in"

Logan was sitting in his bed. He looked really confused and sad.

Before James could say something Logan spoke:

"I need to ask you something first"

"Fine, but what I have to tell you is really important" James said.

"Let me talk first and then I will hear you" Logan said coldly.

Logan was really distant. It was pretty obvious that something was bothering him.

 _ **Meanwhile at the airport**_

Carlos and Katie couldn't get away from the people and since it wasn't in his nature to be rude and impolite they couldn't say no or ignore them.

"Would you take a photo with me or at least give me an autograph?" The boy, who had seen Kendall, asked happily.

"Yes, of course but first tell us where have you seen Kendall" Carlos said forcing a smile.

"I saw him like half an hour ago buying something to eat in that store" they boy said.

Fifteen minutes later they were finally free.

"I have always loved the attention, but in moments like this one I wish I was just a common boy" Carlos said.

"Yeah, if we hadn't been in a hurry it wouldn't have bother me at all"

They started to look for Kendall, but it was too late. The last fly of the day to Minnesota had left twenty minutes ago, and since Kendall was no were to be seen; they assumed he had taken that fly.

"Stupid Kendall he always gets what he wants; it's not fair" Katie said feeling a little defeated.

"Agh, we went through all this just for nothing; this is really frustrating" Carlos said

"Yeah, and what can we do now?" Katie asked.

"Well, If there is no other choice we will have to go there" Carlos said.

"What? You mean going to Minnesota?"

"Yes, are you whit me in this one?" Carlos said with a smile on his face.

"Of course buddy; this will be fun"

"So let's ask when the first fly to Minnesota is, but first let's eat something; my stomach is doing too much noise"

"Yes, mine too" Katie said.

After they stomachs were full, they decided to ask when the first fly to Minnesota was:

"The next fly to Minnesota will be in seven hours; at 6.00 in the morning"

"Fine. Thank you" Katie said.

"So we have seven hours to pack some things, go for our cellphones, and sleep. It's not enough time, but we need to go as soon as possible" Carlos told Katie.

"Yeah. We'll have to do everything in a rush, but we can't let Kendall win this time. He has to give us a valid excuse" Katie said.

"So let's come back to the house. Maybe we can convince Logan to go with us as well. On the other hand, I don't think we will be able to convinced James since he was determined to stay out of this" Carlos said.

 _ **At the hotel**_

Logan was looking at the wall that was in front of him, for some reason he couldn't look at James while he spoke:

"How are you supposed to feel when the person you like is leaving?" Logan asked, after a few seconds.

"What?" James asked really confused.

"Yes, how are you supposed to feel?"

"Logan…."

"Just answer the question, please" Logan interrupted James.

"Well, I think you're supposed to feel empty, your stomach hurts; your chest hurts. Actually your whole body hurts. You don't want to do anything and you just want that person to be with you. Or at least that was what happened to me when my last girlfriend left last year"

"I-I fuck; I'm just an idiot"

"Logan, what's going on?"

…


	9. Chapter 9

_Here it is the last chapter of this story. Hope you like it, and I hope I haven't ruined it. Please, please let me know what do you think of this. It will mean a lot to me._

* * *

 **Normal POV**

"I-I fuck; I'm just an idiot"

"Logan, what's going on?"

Logan looked at James and repeated what he had already said:

"I'm just an idiot"

"Yes, I mean no, but why do you say that?" James said confused.

"I-I Think I like Kendall" Logan said a little embarrassed.

James couldn't believe his ear and without even thinking he said:

"Wow, you really are an idiot"

"Yes I know and this all my fault. I wish I had realized it sooner"

"Wait, you're still in time. What I wanted to tell you was that the Katie and Carlos had gone to find Kendall" James said.

"What?" Logan asked really surprised.

"When I saw them a while ago, they were going to the airport. They were determined to find him. However, I don't think they could stop him even if they do find him. Actually, you're the only one who can make him stay, and I'm sure you know it"

"I-I don't know. This is so strange; I don't know how to feel. Should I stop him if he wants to leave?" Logan said.

"You told me you like him Logan; don't be a coward and confront your feelings. If you don't do that you're going to regret it"

"James don't act as if you know how I'm feeling because you have no idea how it feels"

"Well, yes; I have no idea how you're feeling. I'm just trying to help. Just tell me, what's the point on letting him go when you know you like him and you know he likes you?"

Logan didn't know what to say; he was confused; really confused.

"Come on Logan, you don't want him to leave and neither do I, so let's do something about it"

"What can we do now? We don't even know if he is still here"

"It's true. Fuck, I should've come here earlier" James said feeling a little bad for not doing before what his friends had asked him to do.

"The only thing we can do now is call Carlos or Katie. They're the only ones who know what's going on" Logan suggested.

"Well, about that; they left their cellphones here. That's why they didn't tell you before that they were gone. I guess they left the house in a hurry" James said.

"Oh, I didn't even realize they were gone until you told me. I've been here in my room since you left"

"I should've come and tell you before. I'm sorry; they asked me to tell you, but I don't know what was going through my head at that moment. I didn't want to be part of all this anymore, but then I realized I was being an idiot and came here, but it's too late now"

"Don't worry. It's fine. The time I spent here helped me to figure out some important things" Logan said.

"I see, so I guess we will have to wait until they come back to know what happened"

Minutes had passed. Logan and James were in the living room waiting for the guys when they heard someone opening the door.

"I think they have come" James said.

"We don't have too much time. Do you know where our cellphones are?" Katie asked as soon as they saw the other two.

"Wait. What happened? Did you find Kendall?" Logan asked.

Carlos was going around the whole house looking for his cellphone.

"No, we didn't. But we are 99% sure that he took the last fly of the day to Minnesota"

"Oh, he was fast, and now?" James asked.

"And now we are going to go to Minnesota, that's why Carlos is in such a hurry. The next fly is in six hours and we want to take that one. Are you going to come as well?" Katie said smiling.

"Yes, of course I will go. There are some important things I need to tell him" Logan said.

"Great. What about you James?" Carlos asked expecting a "no" as an answer.

"Yes, I will go too. Sorry for being so cold before"

"Excellent. Oh it's fine don't worry. You did come after all" Carlos said.

 _ **Minnesota**_

"We're finally here" James said when they got off the plane.

"Yes we are in Minnesota, and now?" Carlos asked.

"I think I should call my cousin since Kendall is not answering his phone and maybe he knows where he is" Katie said.

" _Hi, Katie?" His cousin asked a little confused._

" _Yes, it's me"_

" _Oh I see. If you're wondering where Kendall is. Yes he is in Minnesota"_

" _Wow, you can read minds. But we actually want to know the exact place where he is"_

" _Why? Are you going to come here just for him?" Tala asked sarcastically._

" _Actually we're already in Minnesota, so yes we are"_

" _What?" his cousin asked surprised._

" _Please tell us where he is. I'm wasting a lot of credit" Katie said._

" _Ok, I will tell you. After doing all that I can't deny you that, he is in hotel near our house, wait a little I will give you the exact direction in a moment"_

" _Thanks you" Katie said._

"What did he said?" "Where is Kendall?" "Is he here?" They all asked at the same time.

"Yes, Kendall's here. And he gave the address of the hotel he is staying in" Katie said.

Once they were in front of the door of Kendall's room they rang the doorbell and wait for an answer. A few seconds later, Kendall opened the door:

"What? What are you doing here?" Kendall asked really surprised.

"We came to take you back with us" Katie said.

"What? If I left was because I didn't want to be in the same band as you anymore"

"Kendall would you at least let us come inside" James said.

"Oh, yes sorry" Kendall said and let them inside.

Once inside the house; the first one to speak was Logan.

"Kendall I need to talk with you" Logan said.

"I don't have anything to talk with you" Kendall said seriously and with a hint of anger.

"I think we should leave" Carlos said, whispering to the others.

"Yeah" Katie said, and they all left the room, leaving Logan and Kendall all alone.

Logan waited until the others were gone and then he finally said:

"Why are you acting like this? Why did you leave without even saying one word? You didn't even have the guts to say you were leaving"

"Don't play dumb Logan" Kendall was getting irritated.

"I'm not playing anything Kendall. The only thing I know is that you left" He was actually playing dumb because he really wanted to hear Kendall saying the truth.

"Logan, I know you know. Stop this"

"Know what? I don't know what you're talking about"

"Shut up" Kendall told him angrily.

"I won't shut up. You know why? Because I have a few things to tell you…"

"And I don't want to hear them..." Kendall interrupted.

"I thought you were braver, but I have realized you're a coward, a coward who can't deal with his problems properly" Logan told him. He was angry as well, and he couldn't stand the fact that Kendall left without saying anything.

"What are you trying to do Logan? You want me to feel even more miserable? "Kendall almost scream.

"I want you to tell me why did you leave? Why have you ignored me for the last few months, and I want the truth"

"Can you stop this?" Kendall said.

"Are you going to say something? Or are you going to ignore all my questions?" Logan said angrily.

"Why do you want me to say something you already know?"

"Because I want to know if you're as braver as you want everyone to think" Logan said.

"You want to know why? Fine, I will tell you why. It was because I can't stand you. I don't want to be in the same band as someone like you; I don't even want to be in the same place as you anymore. That's the truth, are you happy now?" Kendall said and what he had said was half true and half a lie.

Both of them were angry and it was clear.

"I will be happy the moment you are honest, so if you want me to stop this conversation grow some balls and tell me the truth in my face"

"Why are you doing this? Why? What do you really want Logan? You're being a complete asshole and you know it"

"I just want you to answers what I'm asking; that's all. Is it that hard?"

"You came all the way to Minnesota just because you wanted me to say that? Why? If you already know the truth"

Logan had nothing else to say, so after a few second of thinking what he should said he finally opted for the truth:

"No, I came here because I was dying for doing this…"

And just like that Logan kissed Kendall on the lips.

"Wha- what are you doing? Are you making fun of me?" Kendall asked really confused.

Logan laughed briefly and then said:

"I can't believe I actually did that, and no I'm not making fun of you; I did it because I wanted to"

"Logan, this is not funny. You know how I feel about you" Kendall said really confused.

"I really don't, I've never heard you telling me anything" Logan said calmly.

"What are you trying to do?" Kendall said getting angry again.

"I just kissed you, what do you think I'm trying to do? I like you Kendall, and I want you to come back with us" Logan said with confidence.

"I-I-I…" Kendall was speechless his mind had gone black and he didn't know what to do or say.

"Wow, a nervous Kendall is something you don't get to see so often; I'm glad to be able of making you feel like this" Logan said smiling.

It looked as if they had changed rolls. Kendall was nervous and Logan was really confident.

"I-I am not nervous…"

"I have told you that I like you. Aren't you going to say anything about that?"

"I-I-I li-like you to-too" Kendall was so, but so nervous that he really didn't look like himself.

"Kendall what's going on with you? Why are you acting like this?" Logan said smiling; he was a little worried about Kendall's behavior, but he was really happy at the same time because he had actually heard Kendall saying those words to him.

"I… How could you say all those things so easily? Isn't it strange for you to like a man?"

"I-I haven't had time to think about that and I really don't care if you are a girl or a boy. As soon as I realized you were gone; the only thing I wanted to do was bring you back with me. Yes with me not with the band, and-and that was when I realized how I really feel about you"

"I will come back with you, and for your sake I hope it's not just a façade to make me come back to the band" Kendall said.

"I will never lie about something like this, and sorry for making you go through all this. I was not really aware of my true feelings, or maybe I've always know it, but never really wanted to admitted them; well at least not until I realized I could lose you"

"It's fine. You were right about something I was really a coward for not confronting you about my feelings. It's-it's just that I couldn't face it, so I left. Wow that just sounded like something a total coward would do"

"What I said before I really didn't mean it; I was just trying to make you angry. I don't think you are a coward. I understand that it might not have been easy for you"

"Logan I like you. I have liked you for a long time" Kendall said smiling a little and feeling really embarrassed.

"I just wanted to say it properly" Kendall added later.

"I like you too Kendall, but what are we supposed to be now?" Logan said.

"Let's just be whatever you want us to be" Kendall said casually.

"Fine, you are my boyfriend now then" Logan said smiling.

"Ok" Kendall said and then he kissed Logan; they had anything else to say to each other. That kiss was enough to say it all.

 _Meanwhile_

Carlos, Katie and James were dying to know what was happening between those two; well specially Carlos and Katie, since James had an idea of what might be happening inside that room.

 _The end._

* * *

 _Thanks so much to everyone who has read this story so f_ ar.


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